Due to this happening only yesterday, thought I would share this experience so others might learn from it.  Both clients and other Dommes.

I don’t normally moan or put up negativity but there is a lesson to learn here:

Client enquired about a booking date coming up, I replied and sent over my booking procedures blog and date I could do. He then went awol past that date and then got back to me with  arranging a new date/time and paying a deposit.

He emailed that he had sent at 00:16hrs on a Monday & then chased for a reply just over one day later (1st red flag/impatience) I replied to that message acknowledged/thanks for deposit and instructions to call me prior to the day and as well on the day from postcode given at exact time.  He replied to that message saying he had paid to a wrong name to the one I gave him (another little red flag, not following instructions)

We are now at the night before he is due, I haven’t received a phone call as instructed.  I have to send an email asking if all is well and that I haven’t heard from him.

Day of session and no reply to the email and still no phone call.  Do I get ready?  I shower/dress & minimum make-up, it gets to 11:06am and I’ve not heard anything, I go to the location I have given and eventually see a car pull up but no one calls my phone (I’m holding)  No car lights flash, no wave etc.

I then receive a call 11:16 from him, no apology at all (red flag) he states he didn’t have my number on him (another red flag) The most obvious thing is to have a phone number on you.  I asked what car he was in (it was the one I saw pulling up) he had seen me, but didn’t do anything. At this point he has got quite aggressive) so I tell him due to his incompetence and attitude I will not see him and then proceeds to argue with me, talk over me and raise his voice!  I ask him if he thinks as a woman conducting a session on her own, should I be allowing someone behaving like this in her home, he kind of agrees but still argues so I hang up.

***In short, poor communication skills, no respect for My time due to his poor time keeping and lack of preparation and immature behaviour***

Re the deposit, I returned 80% of it.  I certainly didn’t have to.  I had turned another booking away that day and wasn’t taking any others due to going to a festival.  A respectful gentleman would have insisted I keep it and paid the balance.

I haven’t received any apology.  He probably doesn’t realise just how he has behaved.  An absolute pillock.

I won’t tolerate this kind of behaviour.

Moving forward:

I am returning to taking a non returnable call cover/booking application fee of £20 for ALL new booking enqs, or complex enqs involving a third person from clients I have seen before.  Once we have spoken and agreed on a session, I will then require the usual 50% non returnable deposit to secure it.  I will adjust the final balance for those who book and attend so that genuine decent people are not penalised.

I expect clients to turn up on time or notify me politely if they are running late.  If I am able to keep their booked time in full then I will, however if I am unable to due to the late arrival then it will come off their time.

First impressions, men’s attitudes and how they conduct themselves count. I will not be returning any deposits at all in future if I ever have anyone behave in this despicable manner, that my hand is forced to turn you away.  Shame as I love meeting new people and having fun in sessions.